Preview: Morning Routine

Yeah, it was right after the promotion that I decided to start waking up earlier. My work hours hadn’t changed. At least, not on paper. Not that any of my duties were written down. I didn’t get to my level by filling out a checklist. I drove solutions. I moved the world. Seriously. If I had to grab the whole damn earth and shove it two feet to the left because that’s what my client needs, that’s what I did. And it didn’t matter if it was lunch time, dinner time, or “boss just got out of the club in Tokyo and the deal needs to close while everyone is nice and slippery” time. Out-late, up-early wasn’t new, but after the promotion I developed a routine. I started optimizing.

I had help at first. Maddy, this one girl I was seeing, was super into getting up and doing morning hikes so that she could get these perfect photos at the top of a scenic spot with that sunrise light, you know? She was twenty-six and her feed was full of those “going out/going outside” type of posts. Like, the perfect fit on Saturday night next to the perfect view on Sunday morning. Good content, but cheated: she would actually take the morning photo days earlier and just post it from bed on Sunday. I would do hike-hookups with her on, like, a Thursday when I had been working late the night before. She got to have her beauty sleep or whatever, then tell me to wake up at five a.m. and look as hot as her. 

Well, I was fucking nailing it. Stealing the show even with my shirt on. So I figure, if I can wake up before dawn, flex on her, go back to my penthouse, shower, hit it, shower, have breakfast, and take my first call of the day while most guys are jerking off… maybe I can crush the early morning every day.

I read that to change my wake-up time I should do it in fifteen minute chunks, get used to it for a few days, adjust and repeat. But I had already done some of those five a.m. days, which was like a two hour jump, so I knew I could slam one-hour shifts to see bigger gains. I started waking up at six and immediately I felt great. 

I was like: Yes! This makes so much sense! From my balcony I can see construction workers are already climbing big-ass cranes.  Men are out there working! What had I been doing at that time every day? Being dead, pretty much.

It also felt good to finally use all the self-improvement stuff I had lying around, like this ultraviolet teeth-whitening thing. I hated to use it at night because a weird aluminum taste would stick on my gums while I was trying to fall asleep, so I put it in a drawer and forgot about it. But with a morning routine I could pop it in after brushing and let it sit while I wrote my goals for the day in the wood-bound Spirit Journal that had also been totally neglected. The UV flavor absolutely ruined my single-origin drip coffee the first few days I tried it, but I had been planning to cut caffeine anyway because of a blog I read.


This was a preview of my story Morning Routine. Contact me for inquiries.
– Sebastian Sangervasi

Mileage

In 2036 the State of California granted an incentive to drivers of electric trucks. This was just one act in a decades-long attempt to remove low-efficiency, high-emission vehicles from the roads, but because the situation was increasingly dire, the grant was unprecedented in its generosity. A confluence of political promises and lobbying efforts, the Clean Miles Rebate Project (CMRP) came to include two key terms:

  1. Rebates would be issued for the cost of charging zero-emission commercial trucks, adjusted for Provable Miles Driven (PMD).
  2. Light-duty trucks would be eligible for these rebates.

The requirement that mileage be provable was intended to prevent obvious abuses of the system. Hypothetically, a truck owner could use its vast battery as an electrical reservoir, let the vehicle sit in the driveway undriven, run their home from its charge, and be reimbursed by the state. This behavior was portrayed as a form of fraud, even though Pacific Gas and Electric was in open support of it as a method of reducing load on the state’s power grid. Still, a measure targeting vehicles was not meant to pay for energy infrastructure, so when auto manufacturers championed PMD-tracking technology they were commended for voluntarily cooperating with regulators.

In reality, proving mileage in commercial vehicles was a long-solved problem. Telematic devices sent robust engine diagnostics with sub-second update frequency. Odometer readings collated with GPS tracking, cell tower pings, and local network scanning provided an irrefutable log of every inch of vehicle motion. For commercial fleets, PMD reporting was trivial. It was mandatory. That market was saturated.

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The Readers

Three women sit in repose: Yerjena, Lorin, and Fig. They are in a breathy library full of supple leather loungers, which is also a courtyard shaded by a grand marble statue garnished by wandering ivy, which is also a polished aluminum bunker that is vacuum-sealed against the corrosive future. They do not move often. When they do, it is a stimulating motion that reminds the viewer that these women, effortlessly focused though they are, have living muscles that need a tender adjustment every few beats of eternity (roughly ten minutes, we gauge). The sky casts shadows on Lorin’s legs; she tucks them under a glass blanket and lets the flames lick her toes.

“Everything he fears is mundane,” she declares.

Yerjena and Fig await her insight. They are aware of Lorin’s activity. They are always aware. There is a spiritual unity between creatures which is facilitated by a delicate screen that floats in the microlayer between the conjunctiva and the sclera, though when their eyes are open they may see the blinking marquee which is always erupting around each woman’s head to remind the viewer of what she is thinking and how her face may deceive. 

Lorin slides down the bannister of the spiral staircase to meet her colleagues on the upper floor of the library.

“I have been reading the story in word-order,” she explains. “The Commentaries say this ancient work evoked dread.”

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Regarding the Orbital Terminal Incident

On the day in question, most of my energy was spent traveling. It must have been around five o’clock, West Africa Time, when the lights in the railcar flickered, dimmed, then went dark entirely.

My colleague Bernard stiffened beside me. I felt him groping at the seats in front of us as if the train were going to rearrange itself in the darkness. Subvocal utterances revealed his disquietude. I determined he was unaware of his own animal noises and so, surely, he was unaware of the electrical whine of the magnetic brakes engaging beneath us. I was not especially worried by the change; the tunnel had slowed our transport to barely a trot prior to the loss of power. However, I did find myself wondering what it would sound like if the machine had to deploy its kinetic pads to bring us to a halt. Would we hear the metallic scream of an ancient locomotive echoing through this ultramodern coach? Such a thing would only occur if the rail lines lost power completely, of course. The absence of this emergency measure was proof enough that there was no cause for concern. I began to phrase this for Bernard, but he spoke first.

“Aha, observe: the station has already restored its connection.”

His intonation suggested he was trying to reassure me, but it was not I who was craning my neck to take in every inch of the conveyance. Still, I took a gander to humor him

There was enough luminance leaking through the slim slipglass portals to give shapes a some definition. The curved edges of urethane seats repeated themselves down the aisle a dozen meters to the front of the car. The domed window there allowed me to observe dots of light in the ceiling of the tunnel outside. They ran over us, then crept, then came to a halt. I could only observe a few of these lamps before they faded into obscurity in the tunnel’s depths. This amber glow was enough, though, to reveal the falsehood of Bernard’s claim: the power for these lights was quite obviously sourced from battery failsafes. The crisp iridescent bulbs of the platform were left inert, dumbly indicating their disconnection.

For this I was grateful. The ambiance soothed my weary eyes. Sunset red – the lowest end of the visible spectrum – was appropriate for the moments after a blackout. It was appropriate, as well, for the end of a long journey underground. I took to the aisle, spirit renewed, startling Bernard with my confidence. I surmised that he was peering through the slipglass in hope of spotting an attendant coming to aid us. I had already dismissed this as a false hope, and I told him so: though our arrival was scheduled, a remote docking station had no hands to spare for civilian travel. Flatbed freight lines ran on rails parallel to ours, but with tonnes of Earth separating the tunnels. I described how operators were at that moment scurrying to manage the loss of power and still meet their deadlines with the facility above. This was a routine inconvenience for them and only a mild disturbance for us.

He conceded the truth of my words and aided me in dislodging our baggage from their holds. He made a comment about guiding my weak eyes in the dark, which I found rather condescending. Bernard knew of my corrective surgery and, as a scientist, should understand how impeccable the treatment had been. I let the slight pass by without comment. I understood in the moment that he needed to glamorize his youthfulness to combat his childish fear of the dark.

The platform was vast and lonely. The farthest train car doors were far beyond my range of vision in the dim red glow of the station. I could hear them all shut in a chorus: a sound that was never meant to dominate this space. Voices, shouts, the shuffle of footsteps; this was once a bustling place. We ascended the escalators and I let Bernard take the heaviest baggage, one step at a time as we climbed the inert transport mechanism. It occurred to me then that Bernard had never seen this place when it was in its prime. This would be his first ascent into orbital space. Perhaps it was misguided of me to think he had been scared of the dark, rather than the climb into orbit that was in our immediate future.

The silence was broken when we crossed the threshold of the sky bridge. Mercifully, the automatic doors had maintained power. When we entered that glass-enclosed tube we felt the vibrations of the trucks crossing down below. Just as I described, the cargo carriers were operating at full, almost frantic, capacity. I observed them, briefly wondering whether they were behind schedule or if this was their usual frenzy of action before an ascent. The sunset to the west had a glow no stronger than the running lights guiding us across the bridge. The horizon ended over the Gulf of Guinea, I knew, but all that could be seen was a blackening mass of clouds. The storms were rising to consume the night.

I began to comment on the oncoming weather, but I reconsidered it when I remembered Bernard’s first-flight nerves. It was then I discovered he had stopped in the middle of the bridge, several paces behind me. He stood at the apex of the arched structure, staring eastwards and upwards. Even before I followed his gaze into the night sky I knew what he beheld.

“This is not my first time spotting it.”

He seemed to anticipate my question.

“I wrote most of my doctorate in Sri Lanka. In the southern region it was possible to look towards the equator and see it on a clear day. A column of steel. A needle scratching across the grooves of the Earth, playing the music of space.”

I approached the window to stand beside him, leaving the baggage so I would not have to haul it twice. We watched the thing approach us: the International Space Elevator. It was only a line of lights. An innocuous warning for an unstoppable force. The boundary of its airspace was impossible to define, and the lights made no effort to do so, but those points of color climbing into the sky were a marvel of their own. I let Bernard have his flight of fancy, ignoring his erroneous description of the thing as steel. Very little of the structure was metal, or any solid material at all; only beams of magnetism were strong and light enough to maintain such a miraculous formation. And it might as well be a miracle to scientists such as ourselves: archeologists, not engineers or physicists. So I let him have his poetic pronouncement, trying to remember if I had any words as apt when I was his age.

“Come,” I said to him when the marvel had grown stale. “It will be upon us within the hour.”

Bernard broke away with a nod. He took up the bags I had left down the bridge with a renewed spirit of chivalry or excitement. As I struggled to catch up to him I was struck with the thought that this was how my mother must have seen me when I raced ahead to that first ascent, so many years ago. How different was this terminal then: she would have had to watch me through the shifting crowd, all of us pushing forward into the compartments that would carry us through the atmosphere. How different was I, as well: not eager, not hurried by curiosity. Only an old academic’s commitment to research drew me forward and upward. Only an old skeptic’s questions propelled me towards dread.


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Face

After four days without shaving, my face became obscured by shitty little face-pubes. The patchy chin-scarf had to go, so I pull out my electric trimmer and make the blades do their dance. Up the sideburns, around the adam’s apple, the insubstantial fluff cascades into the sink. It gets clogged in the drain catcher, though, so I have to reach my hand in there and get my fingers covered in congealed snot and hair.

I throw the clump in the trash. About a week later I put that trash my building’s can which then gets dumped in larger bin. A bird gets at the trash and pulls out my hair clump, picks it apart, seals the walls of a nest, hatches some babies with it, pushes the babies out and eventually dies.

With the bushy stuff gone it was time to scrape my face with a razor. Some of those stubby bristles get caught in the clump, most go down the drain. I scrape too close to a zit on my chin it pops prematurely, like amputating a limb I didn’t want in the first place so fuck it. But the pus and blood mixture spurts out and sticks to the mirror, so I have to use a washcloth to smear it off. I don’t get it all, though, so the chick who lived in this apartment after me looked at her reflection through a very thin layer of my zit blood, which was pretty insignificant compared to that bird’s experience, really.

I’ve pretty much finished shaving but I’m bleeding already so I pick at a few other blackheads and blemishes until I’m so thoroughly disgusted with myself I want to slit my own throat. So I stab the razor into the corner of my jaw (goddammit there’s a patch of hair I missed) and cut to the opposite ear, then over my cheek, the ridge of my brow, and back to the start. My skin starts to fall away and I have to hack at my nose to get it away from eyes so can watch my muscles spasm in the mirror. I throw the flesh that used to be my face in the trash, but the bird doesn’t get to that before some racoons do and we lose track of it from there.

I thought the muscle groups of my face would be interesting to look at, but mostly I’m staring at the cartilage in my nose as blood streams between my eyes and drips off the tip. Cartilage is pretty cool so I figure bone must be more interesting than muscle. The razor has a hell of a time scraping my jaw and cheeks clean but, hell, with a little effort I uncover the bones that really make up my face.

The washcloth sops up most of the blood and, sure, smears some pus onto my bones but still I look pretty good now. Bones are beautiful, even the ones that make up my face, and I want to display them on my shelf. First I have to figure out how I’m going to see if I remove the bones that make up my eye sockets. I figure I’ll leave the image in the mirror intact and see through those eyes, which feels weird because everything is backwards, though I supposed it’s the version other people must see. From this perspective I pluck my eyes from my skull and place them on the edge of the sink. I don’t notice that one rolls off and it gets lodged behind the sink so when the chick cleans the apartment she finds it and gasps but then gives it to her girlfriend for mother’s day.

With all of the muscle gone, my jaw pops right off and I dip it in wax and put it on my nightstand. I have to tear at my facial plate hard and bang my head on the wall until the seams joining my brows to my forehead give way and let me hold my face in my hands. Then I stare out of the mirror and look at what remains which, oddly, isn’t brains or anything. It’s hair. Not the hair on top of my head, that’s still there, but this is facial hair. Thick, tangled, bushy-lumberjack-wizard-santa-beard hair where my bones should be. And apparently that’s my face.

The razor is pretty dull by now so I give a once-over with the leather thing that makes razors sharper then dig into the knotted mess. It seems I have a lot of face to get through.

Countdown

Journal Entry – 9/5/2016
Mandy says it’s over. I think she’s serious this time. I don’t know what I’ll do if she’s serious. No I know exactly what I’ll do, what I’ll have to do. That must be what she wants: me. Gone. Forever. Is that what you want? You can’t be serious!

Journal Entry – 9/6/2016
She’s serious. I tried to talk to her before Gym class, to like mention how we’re still going out to the coast this weekend. Mandy didn’t even make an excuse, she said she knew what she wanted and it sure wasn’t spending another dumb weekend weekend with me. That’s what she called it, “dumb,” like great vocabulary bitch get your shit together we have something special. Had something.
I threw up right on the gym floor. At least I got to chill in the nurse’s office instead of spending the period with her fucking friends laughing at me.
I’ll show them.

Journal Entry – 9/7/2016
On Sunday I’m gone. I guess this is my note. No, I’ll need something bigger than this.

Journal Entry – 9/8/2016
I figured out how I’m going to do it, and make a show of it. I’m going to break into my mom’s lab at the Evil Science Company. She’s shown me around her work before, I just need snag her badge and key ring before she gets up in morning.
They test on animals down there. Before I do it, I’ll release as many as I can: mice, rabbits, chimps. Let them all run wild, so when they find my lifeless body, overdosed on tranquilizers, they’ll think I went crazy for some animal-rights cause like some kind of hero.
Except until they read this, I guess? Hi mom! Let everyone think I died for a cause, but tell Mandy the truth. Make her feel that.

Journal Entry – 9/10/2016 (Morning)
Mom, it’s not your fault. Goodbye.

Journal Entry – 9/10/16 (Evening)
What is happening to me?! I can’t go home like this! Where do I go?

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Welcome To The Collective

We do not eat our children. We do not beat our children. We fear them, as all wise people do these days. However, we have found ways to keep our community thriving without devolving in barbarism like so much of the world. Here at the California Collective, we treat childhood like the illness it is, and we are developing the cure.

Before joining our community, we expect new members to be familiar with our history. It is important you understand how we formed during the chaos of The Great Tantrum. You should learn how we found stability, and our current approach to new generations. This will acquaint you with our ethics and social guidelines.

In the first year of The Tantrum, the California economy collapsed more abruptly and more completely than most of other states of the former Union. As you know, all children grew manic, then violent, and eventually completely rabid. Every nation of the fell into a state of civil war as armed forces had to be deployed to protect adult citizens from the unrelenting attacks of children of all ages.

For a time, most regions were able to maintain order while fighting this war. California’s economy, however, was too reliant on the demand of children. Most forms of entertainment were completely abandoned. Stores closed, malls closed, and soon there were whole counties where money was worthless and desperate adults hid indoors, attempting to avoid the young hoards. Only hospitals without maternity wards remained open after the the first days of The Tantrum. Schools and universities became cemeteries and battlefields.

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The Alien Mental Invasion

Universal Timestamp 30-Z-08:44:01

“Captain! They have control of the Primary Thrule Engine! They’re bringing us into their ship’s gravity field!”

It was my fourteenth year in space, my third as Fleetship Captain, yet only six months into extra-galatictic sky and two days before Christmas. I thought I was prepared for this post, but this opposition had me crying for mommy. These foreign ships had been seen before, just weeks ago on the damn-near other side of our galaxy. This appeared to be the same ship, having traveled an incredible distance in such a short time. Or perhaps it was another ship of the same kind, and they have our galaxy surrounded. In any case our prospects were grim.

“Give me reverse thrust, all you’ve got!” I commanded,  “Engineer, tell me we have some way of breaking free.”

“I can’t see how, Captain. They have already cut through all our Drum Resistors.”

She was right: the navigators were throwing up their hands as the other ship forcibly brought us in for docking. I had to be somewhat glad they hadn’t destroyed us on sight, but then an impossible portal grew on the side of the ship we were approaching. Looking into its piercing, liquid light, I had only dread for the other side.

“Good people, my crew – please hold faith. Every day we face the unknown. Today the unknown faces us. We must stay strong, maintaining both curiosity and caution, while we find a way to communicate with the force that approaches us. Let us do this, together!”

As a wave of resilience spread across the faces of my crew, I faced into the portal with them and gritted my teeth.


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